6/7/16 - TUESDAY MORNING QUARTERBACK

Tuesday Morning Quarterback

MITB Fatigue
With so many hours of television to fill each and every week, WWE has the bad habit of giving away much of their PPV matches, before the actual match takes place, leaving an audience exhausted and unexcited before the start of the big event. For weeks leading up to an event, the WWE Universe will see the competitors face off in several different ways over and over again until we've simply had enough and scream to ourselves, "I can not take it anymore!!!!"I'm pretty sure that kind of repetitiveness is reserved for Vietnamese torture camps; but, that doesn't slow the WWE down. This always takes away from the upcoming PPV match. Last night on RAW, each Money in the Bank competitor faced another Money in the Bank competitor in single competition. The result was approximately 1/3rd of the show devoted to these men wrestling, whom we are supposed to be excited about seeing wrestle each other again in just a couple of weeks. Ordinarily, I would love to see Cesaro vs Chris Jericho and Dean Ambrose vs Kevin Owens. I just don't want to see it when I know they are definitely going to be squaring off in a bigger match (I am supposed to be thrilled enough to pay for) in a couple weeks. Building the PPV events up, is a far cry from giving them away and in turn, exhausting the WWE fan base.



Quote of the Week
"You don't have to introduce us. We're all big stars except for Sami. No one knows who he is." - Kevin Owens on fellow Money in the Bank competitor Sami Zayn





Five Things I Think I Think
1. I was never one of those who fantasized about a dream match between John Cena and A.J. Styles. I simply saw them as two extremely different entities in two vastly different worlds. Now that I see the two of them cut vicious promos against each other, I regret not having been more of a dreamer. These two are over the top exciting as rivals and as they cut promos: A.J. on Cena burying guys like him and Cena on Styles being an absolute bust, you get the feeling both of these guys really dislike each other. All that means is they're doing their job and a great one at that.
2. Teddy Long returning didn't get me all warm and fuzzy with feelings of nostalgia. It brought me back to a time when wrestling was much worse than it is today. If anything, Teddy Long's return should remind us all that as exciting as the brand split is, if history is any indicator, it has the potential to be quite awful.
3. Social media blew up with complaints. The Seth Rollins special, along with the Seth Rollins video package that aired on RAW make us like him more. So is he a heel or a baby face? Currently WWE is pushing Rollins as a heel; but, make no mistake about it, he may be on the slow climb toward being a baby face. What if he and Roman give the WWE a Match of the Year candidate only to be attacked by the Club, who proceed to ruin the match? What if the encroaching powers of the Club cause Rollins & Reigns and a Money in the Bank winning Dean Ambrose to become unlikely friends and reunite the SHIELD, just in time to take on the Club at SummerSlam? Think it's impossible? The WWE Seth Rollins special did reveal that Seth still keeps a picture of the three in his home. This could happen.
4. Why should Charlotte even bother apologizing at all to her father? In what was an apparent attempt to de-escalate her villainous behavior, Charlotte separated the business from the personal on RAW; but, why bother? A true heel shouldn't care about how she makes her daddy feel. She should relish in his broken heart, rip it out of his rib cage, stomp on it and then light it on fire: metaphorically speaking, of course.
5. J.B.L. said, "The good news is this angle will continue!" He was referring to the Breezango vs Golden Truth feud that is dead on arrival. This isn't good news. This is terrible news. No one cares. At this point, four talents are being wasted for comedic filler material on a show that is already one hour too long. Goldust, R-Truth, Tyler Breeze and Fandango all deserve better and so do we.





Bubba Dudley Should Open a Heel School
Last week I attended a Peoria, IL WWE house show. The opening match featured the Dudleys taking on Enzo Amore and Big Cass. Bubba challenged the crowd immediately, sparking them to intense hatred, which is what a good heel is supposed to do: generate heat. There was no way to have a tepid response to a heel that went into the crowd to rip up signs he didn't like. He challenged audience members that were less than thrilled at his presence, "So this is why you're here on a Saturday night without a date?" His voice, loud and shrill, could be heard throughout the venue without a microphone, as he sounded the part of master villain. When Bubba took a vicious bump in the ring, he tagged out of the match and continued to sell his lower back as he screamed, "Ahhhh! I think I broke my ass." Dudley can run a clinic on engaging the audience. He is that good. There is never a point where he is on break or is not working. Later in the evening the Club took on the Hype Bros; but, seldom did Gallows or Anderson ever engage the crowd the way that Bubba Dudley did. Gallows didn't get angry, or even make threatening eye contact the way that Dudley did. That was disappointing and a let-down from one tag match to another. The heel talent on the roster should sit down and watch Dudley matches on tape. Learn from Bubba because he does this thing called wrestling impeccably and he has been doing this at a high level for a very long time.




The Vaudevillains: My Heroes?
Last week on RAW, the beautiful curvaceous Stephanie McMahon was about to dance for the entire WWE Universe when she was rudely interrupted by the Vaudevillains, as they made their way to the ring to square off against New Day. I was incensed at the interruption. Now we couldn't see Stephanie McMahon dance. I moaned and groaned like Home Simpson was out of donuts. I woke up the next day thinking about how we were deprived of seeing this beautiful older woman bust a move. I hated the Vaudevillains with an intensity reserved only for warfare, all week. Fast forward to last night's episode of RAW and in her segment with Teddy Long, Stephanie dances, sort of. It was awful. She has no rhythm and no dancing abilities whatsoever. Her dancing looked like a constipated flamingo trying to drop a load in a freezing pond. It had zero sex appeal: more disappointing than when Ace Ventura discovered Lt. Einhorn was really Ray Finkle. Now I think the Vaudevillains are some kind of master geniuses sent to us by God to prevent us from seeing awful things that scar the mind. Thank you Vaudevillains for all you do: we commend your service.



This Week's Sign of the Apocalypse
Vader, a 400 plus pound wrestler, who was known for doing Moonsaults off the top rope, criticized the match between Will Osprey and Ricochet for relying too much on high flying acrobatics



Tweet of the Week
Stat of the Week
In an odd display of art mimicking life, William "Paul Bearer" Moody actually worked in a funeral parlor before starting his wrestling career.



The Its Time Rhyme
Float Like a Butterfly, Sting Like a Bee
You were always a saint to me
For a man to hit so hard, but live as a lover, not a fighter
Touches my heart: inspires me to do my part as a writer





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